If you ever had the chance to feel a depression deep inside yourself or to love someone who is dealing with the world’s greatest enemy, you could actually understand the grief and emptiness that these people experience.
And that’s exactly what they need. They need our unconditional devotion, our compassion. But above all, our greatest patience and our strength in times when their energy sources are exhausted to the last drop.
Here’s everything you need to understand when you love a person who suffers from depression:
1. Nobody decides to be depressed
Depression is not something you choose consciously. It is one of the most frustrating and hopeless states of mind a person can experience.
It means feeling empty, broken, sad and sometimes nothing at all. It is a dark veil wrapped around the soul of a human being.
It’s the weirdest monster in your closet that comes out to haunt you whenever you least expect it. And it leaves you paralyzed, unable to take care of your mind or body.
2. Beautiful speech can not dispel the tormenting thoughts
Things like “It’s all in your head,” “It’ll be okay,” “Nothing’s wrong with you” is meaningless. And it just makes things worse for everyone. The bursting out of this ruthless conclusion shows that one does not take their situation seriously.
People who suffer from this condition do not stay in it because they like to torment themselves. Believe me, if it were really that easy to keep going anyway, they would do it in a jiffy, because it’s pure torture, and they scream and plead inwardly that they get rid of it.
3. Depressed people do not want to be a burden to their loved ones
Sometimes you are pushed away for no apparent reason. Try to understand them. People who are dealing with this frustrating disease often feel that they are a burden to their loved ones.
As a result, everyone around him is pushed away and they distance themselves from them. They are already a burden to themselves. Therefore, the concern that even their loved ones have a hard time will only lead to their exhaustion.
4. Being close to depressed people can lead to frustration
It’s completely normal to be frustrated. Being close to people who experience these intense negative emotions can easily lead to frustration. And that is natural.
If you feel that your spirits are deepening, try to find a way to show them your love and compassion without affecting your well-being.
5. Healthy limits must be set
It is important to set healthy boundaries. In the moments when you feel it’s too much for you to handle, try to stay calm and stop before acting in a certain offensive or rude way.
Explain your feelings to them. Be patient with them. Tell them all about your problems and try to find a compromise that works for both of you.
Depressed people are not selfish, they are sympathetic to other problems, and probably can understand them better than anyone else, so do not blame them for having your own problems, and just do not understand.
6. Expect unpredictable behavior
Depression easily overwhelms her. It is a very common thing to struggle with depression.
In one moment they look good, the next they feel extreme fatigue due to lack of energy. This can manifest as sudden, unpredictable plan changes, ghosting, or “shutdown.”
Have no grudge against her. Try to understand the perplexity of your mind.
7. Never take it personally
No matter how hard it is, it’s never about you. It is their own fight against themselves. Because there will be times when they will get lost and you will begin to blame them.
But, no matter what, it’s important to know that it’s not about you. It was never about you. You may need to do something else to heal. Let her do that.
8. You can not force her recovery
Avoid approaching them with ultimatums or impatience. Threatening someone to break up with him if he does not get better is the worst and most brutal scenario I’ve ever heard of.
No, it will not make you any better in the blink of an eye. It’s your decision to leave someone who is too much for you to handle. However, it is only manipulative and obscene to use “hard love” to force them to get better.
9. They need you to stand by their side
They need you to be there for them. Although most of us assume that these people want to be left alone, they really need our help.
Yes, there will be times when they will appreciate loneliness. However, knowing that you are there for them, no matter what happens, will make it easier for them to deal with the situation.
10. It makes no sense to make comparisons between your experiences
Never compare your life or your experiences with them. Do not even try to compare your feeling with hers. Because we are all different people, bearing their own burden.
External empathy and just listen to them.
11. Depressed people are not weak but incredibly strong
Just because they are depressed does not mean they are weak. On the contrary. I know many people who are struggling with the unbearable pain of depression, yet they get up and resume it with the day.
Because they have decided that they will not let depression take their lives. In all the madness, they managed to find and stick to one strand of strength.
12. Time spent together can be very helpful
Take time to be with this person. No matter how much she opposes your proposals for a different environment, such as a night out or a friendship date, you should take time off to be with her.
After all, as it is said and done, you have to remember that depression is not something we should be ashamed of. On the contrary, we should raise awareness and help the needy.