Being cheated on is not a nice experience and yet everyone else deals with such a situation. For some women, partner escapism is the guaranteed end to a relationship, but some are ready to give love a second chance. But that is often not so easy, after the infidelity can not be undone and will always be in the room. The following tips make it easier to forgive.
Same ideas and goals
In a reconciliation, it is important that you and your partner have the same goal. In most cases, an affair is preceded by a reason. For example, if your partner cheated on you for being unhappy in the relationship, the problem is unlikely to have vanished. So you should make sure that you do not sweep the problems under the carpet. Therefore, it is important to address all desires openly, and to work together to clarify and work on them before problems arise again after reconciliation.
Even though couples therapy always sounds like the “last resort” (which is often the case in such a situation), it can be very helpful. After an infidelity, both partners are usually very frustrated, hurt, looking for a culprit and can no longer objectively view the status of the relationship. Here it helps to consult a neutral person who helps the couple to find their way back. It is important that you and your partner feel comfortable with the therapist.
By betraying you, your partner obviously made a mistake. However, you should (alone for yourself) think about what might have driven him to do it and whether you were partly partly responsible for it. Of course not for the infidelity itself, but perhaps for the relationship issues that have made him. If you want to be reconciled, it is important not to clarify the question of guilt, but to find the source problem together.
Be open to change
After such a big break in the relationship, everything is usually different and nothing is the same as before. If there were problems in the relationship before, a fresh start is just the thing. Of course, you can let your partner understand that he made a mistake, but at the same time be open to something new and see the fling as an opportunity.
time for yourself
Especially in a long relationship we often forget who we are. Over time, the “me” becomes a “we”, which makes it all the more important that you think about what you personally want. Take a break and see for yourself how you imagine the relationship in the future, what you want from your partner and tell him everything openly.