Even though most of them would never admit it, the truth is that men have very fragile egos that can be easily broken. Many have low self-esteem and a fragile ego that are trying to hide at all costs.
However, what exactly are these hidden warning signs of insecurity in a man? What are the clues that can help you figure out if a man has confidence issues and if you’re dealing with an insecure partner?
You might not know it but when a man is emotionally insecure, his insecure behavior impacts all aspects of his life. Something probably happened to him in the past which caused him to be this way, and with time, his insecurity became one of the biggest reasons why his relationships don’t work out.
When you first meet this guy, you don’t see his true face right away. Instead, he will probably be quiet and mysterious which will intrigue you and make you want to get to the bottom of all the layers of his personality.
Nevertheless, as time goes by, you’ll notice that this man isn’t sure about himself. You’ll see that he is actually emotionally unavailable and that he carries a lot of emotional baggage which will become a huge burden for you before you know it.
So, what are the signs of a weak insecure man? Read on and find out.
1. He’ll love bomb you way too soon
One of the first signs of insecurity in a man is connected with love bombing. When you first meet a guy like this, he will immediately start acting like you are the love of his life and the one he’s been waiting for all along.
Of course, in the beginning, you’ll be more than happy that you have met this man who isn’t afraid to express his feelings after all those douchebags who were stringing you along for ages.
An emotionally insecure man declares you his undying love you right away. Not only that—he will also start talking about the future he has planned with you, even before you two get to know each other well.
He will immediately post pictures with you all over his social media accounts and introduce you to all of his friends, showing the world how proud he is to have you next to him.
At first glance, something like this will probably flatter you and you will be bursting with happiness about finally meeting a guy who sees your worth and obviously thinks of you as special. Nevertheless, after you think about it, you’ll find that something is wrong with that picture and that you’re dealing with an insecure partner.
How is it possible that he already loves you and you’ve only gone out on your second date? Don’t get me wrong—love at first sight probably exists, but even if it does, you wouldn’t be telling your date that you love them right away.
So, you can’t help but wonder what is wrong with this guy who is obviously too good to be true.
Is he lying to you just to manipulate you and to get into your pants? Or is he so desperate for love that he is lying to himself?
Either way, something is clearly wrong. After all, you are not teenagers, and love declarations are not something a grown-a*s man should play with.
2. He is overly jealous
Another sign of insecurity in a man is his unhealthy jealousy or possessive behavior. Of course, we are all flattered when the guy we are dating shows a little bit of jealousy because that is a clear sign that he is afraid of losing you.
However, this guy is different, and he is literally jealous about every little thing you do. It is like he expects you to stop existing as a person just because you are in a relationship with him.
He wants you to spend all of your time with him and to put all of your focus only on him. This guy is jealous of everything and everyone you give your attention to—your male friends and coworkers, your family, basically anyone who has any kind of contact with you.
Whenever you go out without him, he’ll ask you not to hang out with guys in general. He will call you and text you to check up on you and see who you’re with, using the excuse that he misses you or is bored and wants to know when you’re coming home.
He might even try controlling your phone and social media activity. He wants to know who you’re texting and where you’re going at all times, which is nothing more than a display of his insecure behavior.
In the beginning, this kind of behavior will make you feel special and loved, but as time goes by, you will be sick of not having your freedom. You will be sick of him smothering you and checking your every move. After a while, all of it will start to suffocate you, and you won’t be able to help but wonder why he acts that way.
Well, it’s actually pretty simple—a man who is insecure constantly feels threatened and intimidated, and it is definitely a red flag you should pay attention to.
Insecure people don’t think they are good enough, and they live in the constant fear that you are going to break up with them and leave them for someone else. His lack of self-confidence makes everyone around you competition, and he is convinced that the only way to keep you by his side is to stick to you as hard as possible.
3. He compares himself with your ex boyfriend
When you’re dealing with an insecure man, he won’t only be jealous of the men who are present in your life now. Instead, he will obsess about your past relationships tool–he will want to know what happened before him and what might happen if he happens to leave your life as well.
This guy just can’t face the fact that you dated someone else before him, and that is nothing but a serious sign of insecurity. He will constantly talk about your ex, investigate his social media profiles, and ask you about all the little things regarding your past relationship, especially in the moments when his insecurity kicks in.
Whenever you give him some constructive criticism about your relationship, he accuses you of wanting him to be the same as your ex. He constantly suspects that you’re searching for this man from your past and that you’re trying to rebuild the relationship you had with your ex.
Although you are trying to convince him that you and your ex are ancient history and that you have lost contact, he won’t stop. He is so insecure about himself, and he thinks that you will leave him and get back together with your ex.
Not only that—he will probably talk trash about all of your ex-boyfriends, simply because he is afraid that you are constantly comparing him to them and that each one of them has something he doesn’t. Even though you are very much aware that this is all nonsense, after a while, this guy will get into your head to the point where you’ll even start feeling guilty for daring to have a life before him.
4. He has trust issues
Another sign of insecurity in men is connected with trust issues, which usually come hand in hand with insecurity issues. The guy we are talking about has probably been hurt in the past or he didn’t get enough attention from his ex-girlfriend or maybe even as a child.
Either way, all of it caused a serious problem in his personality, left deep consequences on his mental health, and made him the insecure person he is today. Being betrayed by his ex girlfriend in the past made this man expect the worst from everyone, including you.
He simply can’t force himself to trust you completely, due to his abandonment issues, and he lives in constant fear that you might break up with him. Even if you show him you love him and want to be with him, he will doubt you because some girl cheated on him and broke his heart before you came along.
Of course, this lack of mutual trust makes it impossible for the two of you to build a healthy relationship, no matter what you try to do about it.
5. He plays mind games
Playing mind games is one of the tools emotionally unbalanced and insecure men use to cover up their insecure behavior. And your guy is no exception.
This man has the urge to keep you under control as much as he can because he expects that to raise his low self-esteem. He will manipulate you into doing things he wants you to do, just so he can be sure you are going to stay with him, that you are not going to hurt him, and that you won’t find someone better.
Even though he doesn’t show it at first, this insecure guy doesn’t think that he is good enough for you. Of course, he is frightened that you will walk away from him the moment you see the truth, so he is doing everything in his power to turn the tables.
In order to mask his insecurities, this man will use different tricks and manipulation techniques to make you think you are the lucky one to have him. Without you even being aware of it, he will try to make you believe that you could never find someone better than him and that you should even be thankful for him putting up with you.
Of course, in the beginning, you don’t let him get to you, but with time, his sneaky manipulations make you believe that all of it is actually the truth. This all happens due to this guy’s insecurities, but it is very dangerous because it can destroy your life and mental health as well if you don’t figure out what’s at stake right from the start.
6. His world revolves around you
When you first meet an emotionally insecure man, you are more than happy to finally have a boyfriend who puts the effort into your relationship and who prioritizes you the way he should. You have a real man who spends his entire day texting and calling you, and you are the leading actress in his movie.
Everything is about you. He puts your needs in front of his own, and he does everything in his power to please you and make you feel perfect.
Doesn’t it sound great? Well, it does, but what happens when you want some personal space, sometimes just for yourself, and he is still there next to you, watching you like a hawk?
On the other hand, when you dare to do something he doesn’t want you to do, he gets upset because he can’t control you or he is too possessive and he thinks that no one has the right to ‘share’ you with him.
This man obviously sees you as his property, and as long as you are by his side, everything is perfect. However, when you decide to do something on your own, you have a problem.
7. He has very few or no friends at all
One of the warning signs your man is insecure is definitely his inability to socialize and form healthy relationships with others.
Don’t get me wrong—this doesn’t mean that all introverts are emotionally insecure, but the fact is that men who have self-confidence problems are usually loners and don’t feel comfortable around people, which is one of the first signs of insecure behavior. Maybe they’ll have one or two male friends or coworkers, but even they will get pushed away at some point.
People who don’t recognize emotional insecurity in a man will describe such a person as a shy introvert and won’t see any red flags in their behavior. However, the truth is, they have some serious problems and insecurity issues. They are emotionally unavailable, and if you try to date such a man, you’ll probably end up regretting it.
8. He needs constant validation
The last but definitely not the least important trait of insecure people is their need for constant validation. An emotionally insecure man will always seek your approval regarding all aspects of his life, and he will never be able to take any constructive criticism.
At first, you might find see this as proof of his undying love for you—the fact that he values your opinion and always takes it into consideration. However, after a while, you see that this man is not mature enough and that he needs your hand to lead him through life.
He’ll ask questions like: “Why do you like me?” or “Out of all the men in this world, why did you choose me?” You want him to feel good, so you’ll compliment him and tell him how awesome he is, which will give him an ego boost to get through the day.
Maybe this doesn’t sound that bad. Maybe you’re thinking he is just a poor, insecure guy who needs help.
Okay, it may be like that. However, what happens when this becomes too smothering and exhausting?
What happens when you’re the one who needs to be encouraged, but he can’t do it because he’s even more insecure than you are? If you try to claim your right for attention, he’ll lose it and accuse you of not caring about him now and that you never did.
Do you really want to date that kind of a man? A man who is so insecure that he becomes selfish?
Be very careful of insecure men because they can be very dangerous. Some of them are just insecure and they need a little push—they need your approval to get their self-esteem back.
Nevertheless, there are men whose insecurity issues turn them into dangerous people. It consumes them, and then, if you let them, they consume you.