This question ends up afflicting many hearts that are afraid or hopelessly one day finding happiness in love. However, what I have to speak about in this article may lead you to a new understanding of what you consider to be an ideal relationship.
When we expect the other to make us happy, we are placing the responsibility of our happiness in the hands of our spouse. We create an expectation about their behavior and when this expectation is frustrated we are affected by a sadness and dissatisfaction.
Putting the weight of our happiness on someone else’s shoulders is assuming a victim’s stance. It is to assume that we are not capable of generating our own happiness, and that if one is dissatisfied or unhappy, it is the fault of another.
“If you are waiting for a love that floods you, I’m sorry to disappoint you: that love must come from within you.”
To assume our own responsibility is to share the happiness that exists within us with that person we love. If we understand that we are generators of our happiness, we can take away the responsibility of the other to make us happy and we can experience life together with all its joys and difficulties. Because if we do not realize this, we can fall into another trap that is the one of the conditions. Not being responsible for one’s own happiness causes one to condition love. And when that happens, love loses its brightness to give way to attachment.
True love is sincere and unconditional. Love independent of conditions. When we create rules for love, we do not allow ourselves to feel that true feeling. It is important to understand that love does not imprison, it is detached and allows you to love the person regardless of the situations.
It seems difficult to reach such a love. Well, in order to reach this love, we need to practice it and who better to practice than with yourself? Yes, love must begin first in our interior. How can a person who does not love himself love someone? It is necessary for you to begin to increase the love for yourself, so that it overflows in you and, in this way, you can share it with another person. If you are waiting for a love that floods you, sorry to disappoint you, but this love must come from within you and not from outside.
If we expect someone to come and bring us this love, we are indeed deluded with need. We are thirsting for love, for it is lacking within us. Well, actually, we are not ready to be with another person, because that way we would only make that someone suffer.
Imagine you meet your half face, however, you do not have love on your inside to share. This will cause the other to suffer because you begin to charge the love that is not in you. That is why the soul mate only appears the moment we are in a deep inner harmony and full of love. It is like a fruit that has the right time to be harvested, because if we harvest before we spoil it. We all have a soul mate, but we have to be in tune so that this experience can be experienced in the right way: With the truest love.